Susan Rachele: The Good, The Bad of Being A Perfectionist

Hello, my name is Susan Rachele, and I write this blog entry as a way of owning up to my perfectionist tendencies. Some people may view this as a debilitating thing, but I believe that it is still up to the person to make the most out of it.

In my case, my perfectionist tendencies are only but a small part of who I am. Initially, I was diagnosed with PTSD (Post-traumatic Stress Disorder) and ADHD (Attention-deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder). It's a good thing that my cognitive behavioral therapist looked at the other factors affecting my day to day life and found that I actually have BDD (body dysmorphia disorder), OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), and SPD (Sensory Processing Disorder). With that said, you can just imagine how hard it is to function normally with all these disorders. On the one hand, my BDD tricks me into thinking I have so many flaws and my OCD adds to it, causing me to notice every bit of it. My SPD, on the other hand, causes me to withdraw and isolate myself as I get over-stimulated by my environment.

As for my perfectionist tendencies, I find that this happens in all I do. For example, in connection with BDD, I will not do something in front of others if I can avoid it because I know I’ll look awkward and unattractive while doing so. Before I would jog five miles almost every day, but I would go early in the morning so that no one would see me. The perfectionist in me knows I wasn’t doing it correctly as well, so I would go out of my way to avoid being caught in an embarrassing scenario.

Now I am proud to say that I am making progress is battling these disorders, in part because of therapy and other self-care activities.

My name is Susan Rachele, thanking you for reading my blog.